What's communication got to do with it?

But communication is two-sided - vital and profound communication makes demands also on those who are to receive it... demands in the sense of concentration, of genuine effort to receive what is being communicated. ~Roger Sessions.

In every type of relationship, business, partner, or friend, communication is an integral part. Just like the beginning of the quote posted, communication is two-sided. One, there is a sender. And two, a receiver. Both of these parts are equally important when communicating. Sending a message to a person can take the form of many communication styles.

Today, the focus is on assertive communication. Assertive communication is the most healthiest communication style. Here are some examples of assertive communication statements: " I would like to know when it would be a good time to discuss the finances. I am a little concerned." "I thought you were brilliant tonight." "I know you like fish, but I prefer steak tonight for dinner." I hope you noticed the sentences began with "I." These are known as I-statements. I statements allow for an individual to express their beliefs and feelings without being judged or attacked. The I-statement is about "you" not the person you are speaking to. I-statements are most effective when being with "I" because it allows for ownership. Here are some more examples: "I feel..." "I want..." "I think..."

Changing the grammatical structure of your sentence is equally as important as your tone of voice. Be careful that your tone is not reactive or intense, because this could come across as "blaming" and can "undo" your I-statement. If you need help with learning more about communicating with others, please contact our Licensed Clinical Social Workers at 954-800-0108.

Next week, the second part of communication will be addressed, listening. (I'm sorry speak up I didn't hear you. )

2012 Count What Matters!

Eating Disorder Awareness Week is from February 26th - March 3rd, this week is dedicated to drawing attention to Eating Disorders.

I am spinning the silk threads of my story, weaving the fabric of my world...I spun out of control. Eating was hard. Breathing was hard. Living was hardest.

I wanted to swallow the bitter seeds of forgetfulness...Somehow, I dragged myself out of the dark and asked for help.

I spin and weave and knit my words and visions until a life starts to take shape. There is no magic cure, no making it all go away forever.

There are only small steps upward; an easier day, an unexpected laugh, a mirror that doesn't matter anymore. I am thawing.”

― Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls

Everyone is at risk for an eating disorder, regardless of their age, creed, or color. Along with National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Provide 4 is challenging everyone to change their thinking from the counting limits to counting what truly matters! Instead of measuring your life in pounds, calories, exercise, or tangibles, choose to recognize improved behaviors, healthier attitudes and intentional gratitude for your strengths, your assets, and your personal bests!

Here are some resources for yourself or others who are struggling with an eating disorder:
National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders
www.anad.org
Eating Disorder Recovery and Education
www.gurve.com
National Eating Disorder Association
www.nationaleatingdisorder.org
Eating Disorder Treatment
www.renfrewcenter.com

Start today and ask for help! At Provide 4 Inc, our professional counselors are dedicated to increasing awareness of Eating Disorders and helping individuals who are battling with an Eating Disorder. Call us today at 954-800-0108.

Tips, tools, and solutions to manage your anger

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. ~Buddha

At some point in an individuals life, he or she may experience a natural emotion called anger. Anger is a strong feeling of displeasure aroused by a wrong. So, its normal and okay to have this feeling. The most important component is how an individual manages his or her anger.

Here are some useful tips to manage the "anger" emotion:
1. Relaxation Techniques

• Take deep breaths.


• Count to ten.


• Visualize your "happy" place.

2. Self-talk

• Say to yourself, "Just calm down, is this really worth getting angry over?" "I'm in control of the situation." "It's perfectly okay for me to walk away right now."

3. Rational Thinking

• Increase insight regarding which battles are worth fighting. Some individuals say "pick and chose your battles wisely. "


• Think in terms of "cooperation" not "demanding."

4. Behavioral Techniques

• Psychical activity.


• Talk about it with someone you trust.


• Practice using "I -statements." This is also called assertiveness.


• Walk away.


• Use thought blocking techniques.


• Distract yourself.

At Provide 4 Inc, our professional counselors can help you manage and learn ways to cope with your anger. Give us a call at 954-800-0108.

21 Suggestions for Success

21 Suggestions for Success

by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.

2. Work at something you enjoy and that's worthy of your time and talent.

3. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

4. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.

5. Be forgiving of yourself and others.

6. Be generous.

7. Have a grateful heart.

8. Persistence, persistence, persistence.

9. Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.

10. Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.

11. Commit yourself to constant improvement.

12. Commit yourself to quality.

13. Understand that happiness is not based on possession, power or prestige, but on relationships with people you love and respect.

14. Be loyal.

15. Be honest.

16. Be self-starter.

17. Be decisive even if it means you'll sometimes be wrong.

18. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.

19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.

20. Take good care of those you love.

21. Don't do anything that wouldn't make your Mom proud.

These tips are located in my office as a reminder for my clients and myself to simply get through the day, week, month, or year. It is proven that if an individual continuously reads positive messages, affirmations, or quotes, then he/she will become more of a positive person and will in turn lead a successful life.

Please contact one of our professional counselors if you need help with becoming successful in your life.

Motivational Monday!

There are only two options regarding commitment. You're either IN or OUT. There is no such thing as life-in-between. - Pat Riley

My question to you is, are you IN or OUT? If you chose IN then you are committed to make changes in your life. You show dedication, determination and motivation. If you chose OUT, then we need to establish the above characteristics to change your life to make you committed to YOU! Now, the characteristics listed above by no means an exhaustive list. There are many more characteristics that display commitment. If you need help being "IN" on your life, please call us and our counselors will be more than happy to schedule a brief consultation with you. Call us at 954-800-0108.

What is anger?

Everytime you get angry, you poision your own system. ~Alfred A. Montapert

Throughout the day people experience many feelings, amongst them, anger. Individuals may be angry with friends, family, work, school, an illness, or even themselves.

Anger is a common and normal emotion that occurs in response to an individual's perception of being threatened or harmed. Manifestations of anger can include irritability, physical or verbal attacks, negativism, rage, increased heart rate, and respiratory activity.

Anger can be continuous or intermittent, directed inward or outward, and intense or mild. Anger is often focused inward which can result in self-harm, emotional outbursts, legal issues, feelings of anxiety, and violent explosive behaviors.

However, anger can be expressed apprporiately allowing individuals to let go of stress and frustration and those around you understand that you are upset.

The trick is to manage your anger effectively so that effects you positively, not negatively. Wondering how you do this?
1. Know your anger by recognizing its symptoms (physical, emotional, and behavioral).
2. Identify the situation that has made you angry.
3. Implement coping skills to manage your anger positively.
4. Communicate effectively with self or others.

Remember you are in control of your emotions and reactions.

Need help with managing your anger, please contact our therapists at 954-800-0108.

Happy Chinese New Year!

Yesterday is a memory. Today is a gift. Tomorrow is hope. Peace, love, and happiness for the New Chinese New Year!

Hope is an emotion which promotes the belief in a positive outcome related to events and certain circumstances in one's life. Do you believe in Hope or believe it doesn't exist? I challenge you to make a commitment to HOPE today. Change can start today. It doesn't have to be a new year to re-commitment to goals, morals, thoughts, and intentions. Celebrate each day and look forward in the direction you are going.

Need help with committing to HOPE, contact our therapists in the Coral Ridge area at 954-800-0108.

Happy Birthday MLK!

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character. -Martin Luther King, Jr.

Character development is crucial when changing the identity of one self to become more congruent with goals, intentions, and morals. Do you know the character qualities you are missing? In order to determine some of these character qualities I want you to think of a goal, intention, or moral that you have been consciously working on. Picture the person who you look up to, kind of like a mentor. Now, ask your self this question: What would a person with more self-esteem, courage, self-discipline, compassion, gratitude, flexibility, and resourcefulness do in my situation? By asking your self this question in relation to your goal, intention, or moral, you end up with a list of character qualities to develop or improve. Now, how do you actually make improvements with your character development? One useful tool is to imagine that you are the person you look up to, your mentor, in all situations and determine how that person would respond to the situation. In turn, you will see your character development begin to change which will positively effect all areas of your life.

If you need help with character development, please don't hestiate to contact our professional counselors at 954-800-0108.

Stress: Good or Bad?

Modern life is full of hassles, deadlines, frustrations, and demands. For many people stress is so common that it has become a way of life. Stress is not always bad. In small doses, it can help for you to perform under pressure and motivate you to do your BEST. But, when you are constantly running in emergency mode, your mind and body pay the price. Here are some useful tips to help cope with stress: eat healthy, exercise, get enough of sleep, self-care, relaxation techniques, or talk to some one you trust. There is "no one size fits all" solution to managing stress. Focus on what makes you feel positive, calm, and in control.

If you need help managing the stress in your life, please contact us at 954-800-0108. We can help.

A New Year A New You!

So, its a New Year and you are most likely coming up with a list of New Years Resolutions. Instead of creating a list, I challenge you to create New Years COMMITMENTS! I know actually committing to something can be difficult. But, you will be happy that you decided to take this challenge. So, you have one year to accomplish the commitment. You can do it! Your commitment can be anything from diet and exercise to bungee jumping.

Here are some tips to make sure your commitment is SMART (S-specific, M-measurable, A-attainable, R-realistic, and T-timely).
1. Your commitment must be specific. Define what you specifically want to accomplish.
2. Create steps to accomplish your commitment. Steps should be small and manageable. Here you are able to see your progress.
3. Identify any barriers that may get in the way of you accomplishing your commitment. Create solutions to each barrier.
4. Identify a specific time frame for you to accomplish your commitment. This has already been decided for you, one year!

Create a NEW YOU by accomplishing your commitment! You can do anything you put your mind to!

HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM PROVIDE4!

Fighting Addiction During the Holidays.

Managing the holidays can be stressful, good and bad. However, for a recovering addict the holiday season may be much more difficult to manage. There are many strategies that people in recovery can utilize to stay clean and sober during the busy holiday season. According to Social Work Today, the following are four very important strategies:
1. Prepare ahead of time. Recovering addicts should prepare a "recovery kit." This should include his/her sponsors contact information, daily meditation, and a list of support meeting available in the area they will be in. Also, the recovering addict should remember contact information from other support systems such as a best friend, mental health professional, or other family members.
2. Arrive early, leave early. At most holiday parties alcohol and drug use typically becomes more prevalent as the party continues, therefore addicts should consider arriving and leaving early. Don't worry the host or hostess will not be offended.
3. Bring beverages. Recovering alcoholics should bring their own beverages to holiday parties. This allows for the person in recovery to have control over what he/she drinks. This can be a life or death situation for recovering addicts.
4. Have an escape plan. If a situation arises at a family gathering that makes the recovering person feel uncomfortable and the temptation to use or relapse is present, then action needs to take place immediately. The recovering addicts sobriety is most important. It is the responsibility of the recovering addict to have control whether they will relapse during the holidays.

If you need assistance with this type of issue during this busy holiday season or any other type of concern, please feel free to contact one of our trained professional counselors at 954-800-0108.

Words of Inspiration!

It's time for the holiday season! As a big fan of Dr. Seuss, here is a Christmas quote that I would like to share with you.

"And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?
It came without ribbons. It came without tags.
It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more."
~Dr. Seuss~

The holidays are meant for a time of love, laughter, joy, and togetherness with family and friends. However, sometimes individuals lose insight of the true meaning of this holiday and become stressed out and overwhelmed with the idea of finding the "perfect gift," having the "perfect" dinner party, and making everyone "happy." People get so wrapped in this, they forget about taking care of themselves. Here are some helpful self-care tips for this holiday season:

1. Prioritize. Create a list of the most important things that must get done. Checking items off your list will help promote inner peace and calmness.

2. Listen to your body. It's simple, really. If you feel exhausted, get some rest. If you are hungry, eat. Remember, it's better to have a refreshing start the next day rather than feeling burned out.

3. Ask for help. You are not a super hero and no one expects for you to be. If you need help with something, simply ask. People are willing to help!

4. Pay attention to your nutrition, sleep, feelings, thoughts, and expectations. Its important to focus on all of these areas.

5. Learn to say no. When was the last time you said no to a commitment? This refers back to prioritizing. If adding the commitment to your "to do" list makes you become more overwhelmed and stressed, simply say no.

6. Breathe. Periodically take deep breathes throughout your day if you are feeling stressed. This will help you relax and regroup.

I hope you find these tips useful. Feel free to give us a call with any questions, 954-800-0108.

Words of Inspiration!

"Happiness is neither a virtue nor pleasure not this thing not that but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing." ~ William Butler Yeats

Yes, this is true! As humans we enjoying accomplishing tasks, moving forward with our profession/career goals, fitness, and creating and maintaining friendships/relationships. However, sometimes we hit a brick or stump in the road and we have difficulty with life. So, if you've planted "seeds " within your life and are having difficulty with letting them grow or maybe you don't know how, call us and we can help. We can become your personal life coach.

Here are some useful tip for goal setting to help you get on the right track with planting your "seeds."
1. Goals must be specific. Define what you specifically want to accomplish.
2. Create steps to accomplish your goal. Steps should be small and manageable. Here you are able to see your progress.
3. Identify any barriers that may get in the way of you accomplishing your task. Create solutions to each barrier.
4. Identify a specific time frame for you to accomplish your goal.

Remember your GOALS must be SMART!