Often, either consciously or unconsciously, we want something from others, especially when we have done something for them. An example would be- " I made dinner, he should clean the kitchen." or "I took her child to summer camp last week, she should offer this week." Do these thoughts sound about right? We are too busy keeping score of our good deeds that we forget that giving is it's own reward.
When you do something nice for someone, just to do it, you will notice beautiful emotions of kindness, love, and peace within yourself. You will feel the reward associated with the act of kindness. You do not need anything in return, not even a "thank you." The interference of our own thoughts of reciprocity gets in the way of experiencing the emotions associated with being kind. These thoughts clutter our mind and we get caught up in our own agenda. The solution is simple. Notice your own agenda and gently dismiss those thoughts and positive emotions will surface.
See if you can think of something thoughtful to do for another person, and don't expect anything in return. Notice how you feel and tap into those positive emotions. Practice this and the beautiful emotions you experience will be the perfect amount of reward.
Kacee's self-help book recommendation: Don't Sweat the Small Stuff and it's all small stuff by Richard Carlson, PH.D.
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Namaste~ Kacee Tannenbaum, LCSW